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Knowledge is power. Ignorance is Bliss. Everything in Moderation.
That's the highlights. The rest that follows today is nothing more than a mind dump so read at your own risk.
For the most part, I consider myself a fairly intelligent woman. So does Mensa considering the invites I get to join. But to quote one of my favorites, I'd never belong to a club that would accept someone like me as a member.
However, while I do get it right 'most' of the time ~ I recognize the my biggest challenge in life is usually I just can't get out of my own way.
Like trying to lose weight by starving (in the past).
Like deciding I to up my calories (this time) to get the metabolism working again and then squinting everytime I see that crazy total on my food diary at the end of the day. Like having to fight EVERY single day not to return to old bad habits like 'hey .. let's go to 1000 calories a day and really shake up the system.'
Early and SINCERE disclaimer: I read journals here the way movie goers munch popcorn. Please do not take anything I say as anything negative about what you do, try, and what is working for you. I know my body and history and what 'hasn't' worked in the past and am trying to stop my own cycle of insanity ala doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result.
My latest 'not getting out of my own way' was enrolling in this website because I liked the food diary and access the site from both laptop and kindle but really liking the 'journal' part because it gave me an arena to vent and cleanse the crap from my very clogged mental system from some four decades of eating craziness.
However, at a time when I couldn't even get my run on sentences under control I decided I was spending too much time here and stop journaling as often.
Are you reading this, Mensa? Do you want your application back?
So after just barely but successfully squelching the urge to throw the cordless phone against the wall this morning I have decided I need to return to my original plan and stick with it.
I actually sat down and started shopping Amazon for my next 'body cleanse' but one of the voices said 'uh... the crap... is in your head. Short of a lobotomy, how about reading your bio, remembering your original goal, and get back to journaling.
So sans in store business, taking the furbaby to potty about 100 times for her excuse to play in the sunshine and taking care of MH today, I'm going to start a mind dump of the good, the bad, and the ugly.
My plan is to break this up into smaller doses because it's junk that's been weighing on my mind and emotions for about four weeks. Some of it is food and health related, some of it is just personal life.
Stay tuned, ignore or run ... your choice :-)
Bella
View Diet Calendar, 23 January 2013:
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2185 kcal
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Fat: 104.50g | Prot: 105.88g | Carbs: 237.99g.
Breakfast: Chobani Vanilla Fat Free Greek, Muesli, Schwans Blueberry, Coconut Oil, Quaker Old Fashioned Oatmeal, Flax Seed, Coffee. Lunch: Planters Nut-rition, Celery, John Soules Fajita, Hummus Nut Sabra, Vlasic Spears. Dinner: Sweet Potato, Ribeye Steak. Snacks/Other: Ribeye steak, Pine Nut Hummus, 100 cal tortilla, Grapefruit. more...
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2795 kcal
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Exercise:
Walking (slow) - 3/kph - 2 hours, Desk Work - 5 hours, Walking (moderate) - 5/kph - 10 minutes, Walking (exercise) - 5.5/kph - 10 minutes, Sleeping - 16 hours and 40 minutes. more...
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