AdaOke's Journal, 12 Aug 19

I'm sorry. 

Thank you Bella 

We are all here with you!!💪🏽 

We’ve all been there. If you’re married, it’s supposed to be the two of you against any problems, not each other. Hugs 💛 

Thanks Moneyhands 

Absolutely adultosaur, I just dont feel my husband understands how healthy relationships work. He only knows how to compete with me....so frustrating... 

From a woman with an opinionated partner in crime, the only advice I can give is to not engage. If you take it personal and let it get under your skin that you feel the need to respond, you lose. Eventually they will learn they are just fighting wind. Good luck solder and may the odds be ever in your favor!  

Thanks a lot AboutMyTribe, that's exactly what I need to start doing 

Don’t know your DH’s background but I did NOT have good role models for married interaction. And the best advice I’ve gotten is from the Gottman Institute website. Embarrassing yes, but I just didn’t know healthy strategies to deal with conflict, or much else, actually. It was a huge help! Rooting for you and your hubby, Ada. 

Thanks adultosaur. I'll check that website out. I'd love some help. Just fyi, we're both Nigerian.  

My husband is sort of like that...I laugh at him and keep going on my path...when he learned he can't get me upset he gave up the game.  

@Jessie...lol...yes, have a good sense of humor.  

You also may have to be sensitive to not correct. Let them think what they think. However, do hold your boundaries about any disrespect by simply saying you do not want to participate in the conversation. Then hold true to that and don't participate.  

marriage is stressful as hell. my husband and i got in a fight on vacation and he drove back home 12 hours away! then he felt guilty and drove all the way back. 🤦🏻‍♀️ 

i hope you two work things out. 💓 

I feel a lot better now. Guess it just helps to know you're not alone. Thanks all! 

Hugs 

I was the one in my relationship that wasn't as supportive of diet choices in the beginning. People are just so darn complicated and have so many different issues going on. Hang in there! Now my hubby and I are on the same page... With diet and exercise. If only all stress and conflict would go away for us all. You are doing so well! Hug that beautiful baby of yours and count some more reps together. 😊😊😊 

Haha thanks melissa & rw!